My gift vouchers added up to £25 and the two LPs I’d chosen were ten pounds each. The T shirts were also a tenner and Mum said she’d put up the rest if I wanted one. They had loads to choose from including Radiohead, Nirvana, Linkin Park, Muse and Green Day… but I settled on an AC/DC one. “Let’s check the size chart.” Mum said, taking it from me. “You sure you want a girl’s one?” she asked, since that’s what I’d picked.

I nodded. Mum smiled and I took it, the LPs and my gift vouchers to the counter. I half expected the assistant to double check the gender of the T shirt against the gender of the buyer but he didn’t. He did compliment my album choices though, as he slid all three into a Fopp carrier bag. We exited Fopp and headed to Market Street. We browsed the women’s and girl’s department of Debenhams where Mum pointed out some really daggy clothes; velvety dresses with white collars or lace trimmed yokes. I wasn’t keen. Mum said they’re nice for this time of year, describing them as ‘wintry’. “Feel the fabric.” she said. I did and it did feel nice, cosy even. “It’d look lovely with those cream tights.”

“I think I prefer that one to that.” I said, pointing to the burgundy version alongside the green one. “…but I don’t really like either of them.” I added.

“Fair enough.” Mum said. We browsed a little further and she instinctively gravitated towards the sale rails. “Some of these are nice.” she said, flicking though a rail full of heavily discounted festive nightwear. “Have you thought about a nightie or nice PJs?” she asked.

Bearing in mind that my mother may already know the answer, I reply by telling her that I ‘might’ have borrowed one of Hannah’s on a couple of occasions. Mum asked which one so I described her navy blue nightie with white stars and a crescent moon on the front. Mum continued looking at the nightwear sale whilst talking, and asked if I borrowed it because I liked it or if it was just an easy snatch from the laundry. The truth is both; first time it was an easy snatch, the second was because I liked it. “These are nice.” she said, showing me a pair of pyjamas; navy blue pants peppered with little snow flakes and a grey T shirt top with a big single snowflake printed on the front, and on the back, an angel wings print made of loads of little snowflakes. My sister has a few T shirts with wings printed on the back and I’ve always thought they were cool… so these pyjamas are similarly ‘cool’. “Shall I get them?” she asked. “They’re only a fiver… down from fifteen.”

We exited Debenham’s and crossed over to Primark. Mum said she was starving and I said I was too. “We’ll quickly grab some knickers then go to Burger King.” she said, heading directly to the girl’s department. “Do these look OK?” she asked.

The pack has five pairs of ‘full’ briefs; each rolled up in a cellophane package. A cardboard insert says Back to School: 5 pack Girl’s Briefs. High Waist. Low Leg. “Er.. yeah.” I sheepishly reply.